WHAT IF YOU LOST YOUR MIND?

By John Maerz BA LMT

     How many times have you heard, “Are you out of your mind?” or “If I have to do that again I’ll go out of my mind!” Many people joke about losing their mind. But, what would you really lose if you did? Would it really be so bad?

     What is the mind? It is, simply put, a vehicle for comparison. Think about it (no pun intended). The mind is a choice or judgment machine that uses comparison as its criteria. When you say you like something it is referenced against, or compared to, other things that you don’t like. If you compare chocolate and vanilla ice cream you make a choice as to which you prefer more. If you’ve chosen a career you’ve compared it to other capacities that you might enjoy and do well in but based on your past experience or what you’ve heard from others you will choose one that appears to be the most appealing. The key here is that in order to compare you must have past experiences or past information you’ve read or heard from someone. So for the mind to be able to function we must perceive the linear progression of circumstances through time from the past to the present; much like a “domino effect.” One circumstance leads to another, leads to another and on and on. It gives a sense of continuity. This gives a feeling of dimension to the mind; a sense of being real and “tangible” through the perception. But why is the choice made in the first place? Why would we bother comparing current circumstances to past events? Perhaps it may assure us that in deciding preferences and choices for the future we will recognize which circumstances will be preferable to us over others. Essentially, we are comparing what was to what might be. We’re setting up a continuity between past, present and future; sort of a mental construct connecting the dots through time. Perhaps we do this so we feel an assumed assurance of potential for having our preferences. This gives us a sense of security and comfort in “knowing” we have some control. This is very dangerous ground. Especially, if we convince ourselves that our future is guaranteed. Concerning issues that are preferential to us this may make us feel “snug as a bug in a rug.” But, what if those circumstances consisted of things that we found painful? We may feel just as guaranteed with regard to our future. Either way, we could talk ourselves into choosing to believe that circumstances are fixed and unchangeable. The flaw here is that if we’ve convinced ourselves that our perceived options are the only ones available to us then we severely limit our potential for growth past our current perception of circumstances. Essentially, we’ve posted boundaries for preferred action and inaction and choose to believe that we can’t go beyond them. Now we see the world reflecting the choices we’ve made and believe that it is reality created by the world, a self fulfilling prophesy, yet, we set it up all by ourselves. We’ve fooled ourselves. We’ve tied ourselves up in a knot. How do we get out? How do we use the mind as a tool rather than getting trapped in its mechanizations? The answer exists in our need to compare. All misery is a result of comparing; either to what we prefer or not. Think about it. It might not be as obvious at first consideration.

     What if we lost, or gave up, our capacity to compare; even temporarily? Wouldn’t that, essentially, be losing our mind? In the moment we did that there would be no past and no future; only the present experience. Granted, we need to do some measure of comparing in order to get along in the physical world with others who “follow the same set of dominoes.” But do we have to do it every waking moment? True, the physical world is perceived through the mind as a linear time frame and in order to feed, cloth ourselves, acquire shelter and to exist in this physical world we must compare and choose what will lead to our best provisions for our survival. But after that’s answered we stretch it to include our comfort, and after that’s answered, for our pleasure. Our whole current rapport with our peers and the speed with which we live has made it necessary to live within that framework of the mind in order to meet others and conduct activities with them at the same time. What was it like before we had clocks? We have bound ourselves to our mentally constructed sequencing and have convinced ourselves that this is reality. The mind has become our standard for perceiving the world. What happened to feeling and intuition? Because the majority of us have all agreed to perceive the world through the same type of sequencing of events by comparing we assume to call ourselves “normal.” But what about the people who don’t? Institutions are full of individuals that we say have “lost their minds.” But what does that mean? Essentially, they don’t look at the past and the future and don’t compare as “normal” people do. When I say “normal,” again, I refer to the consensus of what we, as a clan, agree exists as the average perspective used for living. These individuals have lost the capacity to compare in the same way that “we” do. Somehow their logic or “train of dominoes” takes a different path. In our defense, we might say that they’re in pain but is that because they don’t sequence things as we do or is it, rather, that we pressure them into doing things as we do; only with the mind? In doing so, we also, insufferably, expect those who have fallen through the cracks to exceed to the demands of us, the majority; the “normal” people. All pain comes from resistance to the movement of energy whether external or internal. And this resistance is generated by the mind NOT by the environment or others.

     Again, the mind has become our way of perceiving the world. In using the mind we instinctively classify every part of it as whether it is to our liking or not. To do so gives the mind the tremendous illusion of being in control which it strives for…above all else. This classifying gives us a judgment about the experience. The judgment is rooted in a past assessment or a future preparation. It does not allow for direct experiencing. In experiencing we are totally in the moment. The moment that the mind comes into play we no longer are experiencing but judging about the experience. The more we can drop the mind or stop its judging, the closer we are to other half of our full nature…as a witness and experiencer.

     Before we were born into the physical world we existed in the womb with only our awareness of what we feel. There was no mind. There was no past. There was no future. There was only the now; the present. There was no pain. There was no separation. However, after experiencing birth into the “outside world” we have our first instance of separation leading to comparison and judgment; warmth versus cold, dark versus light, food versus hunger, peace versus chaos; the first evidence of a mind; the first imprints of time. We begin learning to participate in the physical world. This separation is what disappears only in meditation or creative endeavors we are absorbed by.

     To participate in the world we must do whatever is necessary to survive. That means operating in the past and the future to establish continuity with our fellow man to share continued support for our physical existence. But when we get lost in this time line we distract ourselves from the other half of our full essence; the witness and experiencer. There will always be separation through polarity in the physical world. The mind thrives on polarity and comparison. That is the nature of matter and of the mind. But there will always be the absence of polarity and time in being a witness, experiencer and living in the moment. This is the nature of soul. But when we get lost in this timelessness and being in the moment we are unable to participate in life as we know it. To remain aware we must have one foot in each world. Much like light needs dark as a comparison to perceive of itself dark needs light to perceive of it’s self. We need the physical world as contrast to perceive the soul. We need the soul as contrast to perceive the physical world. We must stand between both worlds. Only creative endeavors we get totally absorbed by and meditation allows us to do this.

     Would losing the mind be so bad? No. Would having the mind be so bad? No. Would being trapped in either world to the exclusion of the other be so bad? Yes. Think about it. When the mind is chattering this way and that we feel as if it will never end. There’s no peace. There’s no quiet. We feel like we are in constant “judgment and reaction mode.” When will the thoughts resolve? The truth is that they never will. The mind is unable to let go. There will always be another mountain, another project and another conundrum to contend with. If there isn’t one, the mind will create something to worry about just to maintain a sense of power and control in the world. When we are totally “int the moment” there are no thoughts, no conundrums, no challenges; there is no place to apply or energize movement. We feel lost, free floating and ungrounded. We need a place to allow our energy to flow, to feel connected, to move and to evolve. Without a chosen path, action or task the energy has no place to go. With no place to go we feel glutted, stagnant and over loaded like we’re going to burst. Hence we need a blending of the two. Essentially, it works best when the heart tells us what to do and the mind tells us how. However, in our western world we have gotten them backwards. We believe that thinking should tell us what to do but then we feel puzzled as to why it doesn’t feel right when we believe that we have “it” planned so well.

     To think you are your mind becomes a torture. Knowing is not in the mind. Knowing is in the heart. The heart is timeless; no past and no future. The mind is needed only to describe what’s in your heart. It is only a tool. You are not your mind you have a mind. You are therefore you think. Losing it once in a while only serves us by enabling us to remember the other half of who we fully are; sentient beings learning to experience with the benefits and deficits of the mind; preplanning and purpose. Preplanning and purpose are functions of the mind; time constricted. Heart has no purpose; timeless. It just is and knows and perceives. We need both parts; time and timelessness. They work together. They compliment each other and give us a sense of “fullness.” They enable us to perceive. To be balanced in our approach to life we must put the mind in proper perspective. Alan Watts’ had a poignant observation in his book, “The Wisdom of Insecurity;” “The only security there is, is knowing that there is none!”